Let’s Talk About Meat.

Hey All!

Let’s talk about something close to my heart. Meat! I love meat. N loves meat. We are big fans of surf & turf and even turf & turf! Culturally, meat is a huge part of my life. I grew up with a father from Argentina and a mother from Uruguay. Both countries place a lot of importance around food, primarily fresh farm meat. Variety is good, but most commonly, and importantly, we eat a lot of beef.

I feel very strongly about humans eating meat. This isn’t just because I love the taste and couldn’t imagine life without it. There is plenty of research out there proving that humans are better off eating meat. There are protein substitutes that will get you by, but they almost always fall short when compared to eating actual meat. Now, I will allow that a very select collection of humans may do better without meat in their diets. But this is a small group of people when compared to the 7.4 billion people living on this earth.

What sparked this topic? Harambe the gorilla. I saw this stupid vegan post.

So, the death of Harambe upset me. Not because I think it was necessarily the wrong call. I can understand that perhaps the child COULD have been in danger had the 700 pound gorilla decided to do something violent. It was a really tough decision, and not necessarily the route I would have gone, but I can understand it. Poor gorilla was just taking care of the frighten child. UNLIKE HIS FUCKIN’ MOTHER. I’m pretty pleased with how much this situation has blown up, because that stupid woman has to go home every night, knowing that she actually allowed her small child to climb through a zoo enclosure, fall into a moat and get taken by a gorilla. Parenting award of the year right here. Fuckin’. Idiot.

I have many reasons for not wanting to reproduce, mostly selfish, but, the handful of people I meet that agree with me are the ones that would make excellent parents. I’d be a damn good mama and if some kid has the privilege to be my child one day, it’s gonna be well looked after, and not be falling into any zoo enclosures. You can count on that. Unfortunately, though, a huge percentage of the ones reproducing are the ones that should have their genitalia removed. Like this mother.

Anyway, back on topic. We’ll talk about bad parenting and children some other day. Today I want to talk about meat. Meat and vegans. I found this lovely article that has a very neutral stance on meat-eater vs vegan. I appreciated this article. It was informative, and suggested simple ways to feel better about your human needs. However, most articles about Harambe and how upset people are about the gorilla and not about the meat industry take less than intelligent approaches, as most anti-meat campaigns do.

We need meat. We need dairy. Check out some studies on why children need dairy. Check out some research on the negative effects of being vegan while pregnant. I’ve even seen the results of vegan pregnancies. Want to talk about delayed development?

How about nature. We’re literally the top of the food chain in the world. No creature is more populous and higher on the food chain. We shouldn’t feel bad for eating lesser creatures. If you get lost in the Alaskan wilderness and a 16 foot grizzly eats you, well, tough shit buddy, you’re in his world and he’s the top of the food chain now. You’re nothing more than tonight’s meal to him. So why can’t the steak on my plate be that for me? Because I didn’t go out and catch it myself?

Fine, now I went hunting and shot a doe. What about Bambi? Are you upset about Bambi now? Or I’m a farmer and raise my own beef cattle on my small Vermont ranch and I keep some of my own beef for myself. Is that wrong? How about, I live in New York City where I can’t shoot my own food, or grow it on my balcony. I also can’t even grow a vegetable garden that will feed me for the year. Or get me through the winter.

Our New Yorker needs imported veggies and vegan products. Now let’s make all 8.5 million New Yorkers vegan. Want to do some research on the negative effects of extreme agriculture in the United States? How about all the chemicals being used to maintain and produce that much food. Those broiler chickens have been bred to be so large in size that by the end of their lives, their joints can no longer hold them up. Do you think the eggplant that is now 4 times the size it was when the testing started is safer for you to eat? Mmmm, might want to think that one over.

I don’t agree with HOW the meat industry treats it’s animals. I DO believe their needs to be more legislation regarding the treatment and maintenance of these creatures. This, however, will take time, and I’m not going to force myself to go through a weakened nutritional state to boycott it.

Oh, and let’s talk about how almost no one gets to 30 now-a-days without some sort of bodily issue. Or how there are more children than ever recorded with ridiculous allergies. Did you ever stop and think about how maybe that’s because of all the limitations placed on normal diets?

Let’s leave off with this. Meet Maria. She and her husband wanted to prove that vegans could do anything. That they were not weaker. That they could overcome any physical obstacle just as anyone else could. Unfortunately, though, they were among the handful of people who perished on Mt Everest. I applaud their efforts. Everest is on my bucket list. I hope to one day make the summit and return home to my loved ones. However, I will be taking on said feat when I’ve achieved the peak of my health and fitness. And I will be eating meat.

RIP Harambe, Maria, and the other souls left on Everest.


PS I am an animal-lover. The kind of person who is more upset over animal deaths in movies than people. Everything is a puppy. Every bird, bear and cow I encounter is wonderful to me. I don’t hate animals, but I also don’t have a problem eating them. My cat, if I were to let her go outside, would eat small creatures and I wouldn’t love her any less for doing so.


Hi. This is my first post as The Unconventional Housewife and let’s start off with a kicker.

Earlier this day, my friend E and I had to do an emergency post-work hour drive to the hair salon for conditioner before they closed. During our drive we discussed most things, such as her incoming spawn, bitches at work, and our men. Our men and masturbation in particular.

Turns out she hates it. Absolutely hates when her man touches himself. He essentially needs to pretend he doesn’t and make sure he doesn’t get caught and everything is peachy keen. However, this past week she arrived home and caught him in the act. For the sake of keeping their lives private, I won’t go into details, but the whole scenario was quite amusing. There was yelling and coffee dropping and it ended with E leaving the apartment and taking the dog with her.

While she told the story I could see the rage building in her. It was outrageous how angry the subject made her and she admitted this. Despite knowing it was irrational and ridiculous, she still reacted the way she did. I then shared my opinion. I ALSO feel a completely irrational, seething hatred over the idea of my man, N, jerking off. Why? Fuck all if I know!

The idea of him, at home, without me, pleasuring himself bothers me so unbelievable much. The worst part is, I’m totally hypocritical about this. I masturbate. Not terribly regularly, but often enough to make me a hypocrite.

Let’s go back to the beginning. When little ol’ me first discovered pleasuring myself, I was pretty excited. It’s not just little boys who enjoy it. I’m certain your precious baby girls are upstairs in their beds, gyrating on their favorite teddies right now. But, I was raised in a very strict, religious home and pretty soon after discovering this, I came into the age where my parents felt that it was time to start educating me on some grown-up matters. I.E. sexuality. In particular, how sinful it is and how I must lock away my lady parts and keep them pristine for when my husband finally arrives to take me away from my family and unlocks the secrets that lie beneath my skirt.

Well, let me tell you. They instilled such a deep fear of sin and sexuality in young S that I convinced myself that no one masturbated and that I was the only sick, fucked up child that did this. So I stopped. I didn’t touch myself for years. Pretty close to a decade in fact.

I grew up pretty close with my guy friends, I was a bit of a tom boy, liked video games, the outdoors, etc, and they used to tease me and tell me that everyone touched themselves, that they did, that my first boyfriend in HS did. Little S refused to believe them. I was the only sinful, fucked up kid that had done that and there was no way the good people in my life were doing such things.

Let’s fast forward to my college years. I had now come to terms with the fact that other people masturbated. In fact, my college roommate was all about her vibrator and porn. There was no denying it anymore, I was an “adult” now and had to accept reality. I still resisted though. It was such a deep rooted belief that the act of masturbation was sinful, that even though I’d strayed from the church, separated myself from my parents and was in a very not Christian relationship, I still couldn’t get myself to do it.

In college I dated M. He was that very not Christian relationship. He was my first sexual encounter. My first a lot of things. I had lived such a strict and sheltered life, that when I was finally free of my parents, someone like him was exactly what I wanted. Despite committing many other generally accepted as sinful acts by the church, it took M a long time to convince me to try masturbating. With his urging and my roommates beliefs on the subject, I finally took matters into my own hands and conquered my fears. And guess what! I wasn’t struck down by lightening. I didn’t turn into a pillar of salt. My mother didn’t wake up screaming (that I know of). It was fine. It was fun. It was harmless.

So, first and foremost, it is FUCKED up to make your child fear something like masturbation. Baby S thought she was going to hell. That she was fucked up. When reality is, it’s a normal, natural thing people do. Especially children who are discovering their bodies. What the fuck did I know about men and dicks and sex. Nothing. But I had discovered something new about myself and that’s normal. When I was young I always thought I was such an abomination and what kind of parent wants to instill that belief into their own children? I don’t think it’s what they had intended. I don’t think they knew I was masturbating. I do believe they thought they were teaching me the good ways of the Bible and they thought I was old enough and ready to understand these topics. Obviously they were wrong.

So there, I do think it’s fine for people to masturbate.

However, next, I think the porn industry is wrong. I don’t think you should watch other people in intimate acts. I do think there’s a carelessness about sexuality in today’s society and I DO think children are exposed to it too early. That’s a whole other can of worms though, let’s stick to masturbation. SO, I do think masturbating to porn is gross. Use your own imagination. Get creative. She’s not looking at you, she doesn’t want you, he isn’t fucking you. But, even this, for the single individual who’s lacking in a sexual partner, I can accept. What I cannot handle is a person in a relationship who wants to watch porn and masturbate. No.

You’re in a relationship, you want to masturbate. Okay, go for it. You’re in a relationship, your partner is at work and you want to watch porn and masturbate. No, don’t do it. You shouldn’t be looking at other people’s bodies to get turned on and get off. You should be loyal to the person you’re with and if you’re in a great relationship and you’re comfortable sexually together, there’s no reason you can’t give your significant other something exciting to look at. N certainly has photos to look at. In fact, he’s admitted to using my own photos for it before, and that’s great! I was flattered, but also totally peeved that it happened!

Can someone please explain that to me?! Is it my controversial childhood beliefs fucking with my emotions? Is it ’cause I know he used to watch a lot of porn, pre-me, and that makes me insecure? Is it because I fear that I’m not pleasing him enough that he has to take care of it himself? And, if that’s the case, does that mean I subconsciously believe that about him regarding myself? I certainly don’t think so. I have an amazing lover. We don’t do quickies. I’m never just an orifice for a morning pleasure. It’s always intimate, it’s always great. (& no, we’re not a brandy new couple still in the honeymoon phase) So, why do I masturbate? Because I want to! Because it feels good. Because I want a quickie pleasure. And when I’m with him it’s more than that. So, why can’t he have his own quickie? Some N alone time?

Since I know it’s totally irrational, I keep cool and collected whenever the subject comes up. But inside I’m angry at just the thought of him having masturbated. It’s ridiculous and I know it. The worst part is that so many other women have these same feelings and that sucks. Why is masturbation so taboo? Why do we have to get so irrational? And if your answer is, “I (female) don’t touch myself, so I’m not a hypocrite when I ask him not to,” you need to rub one out before your next shower and then come back and tell me it wasn’t worth it.

I’m lucky in that N always makes sure he takes care me, but plenty of women don’t orgasm during every sexual encounter. It’s harder for us than it is for men and masturbating regularly actually makes lady parts create more fluids and easier to get turned on. According to Everyday Health, it’s even more important as we age because it helps combat menopause caused dryness and age related vaginal shape changes.

What are we taking from today’s post? Fuck. I don’t even know. It’s just a backwards post about masturbation. Did you figure out if I’m okay with it or not? ‘Cause I still don’t even really know what I want.

Have a nice night.